I think I have a new favorite author!
I received this book through Novel Reviewers in exchange for a honest review.
There are so many things I like about this book, such as:
1. Harrison's witty, creative, descriptive, and fluid writing (there were a few grammatical errors, but I believe I had an ARC, so that's understandable);
2. Harrison's inclusion and depiction of a non-white female lead in an erotic romance novel, which is a rare but wondrous thing However, I was bothered by Yves being subjected to questions about her origin of birth, ethnicity, and immigration status, by a descendant of European immigrants. I was also annoyed by Yves being described as "exotic" as if it were a compliment (and by her receiving it as such), as if she were a non-domesticated animal one might see on a safari. In truth, though, I could imagine those things happening in real life, and so given the other realities depicted in the story, I would characterize these incidents as fair, albeit annoying reflections of real life. However, I was a little disappointed that Yves' main love interest, Eli, was a white guy, and one who was sometimes framed as being her white knight in shining armor. It's so rare for people of color to be written into lead roles for mainstream erotic romances, that I'd just hoped to see a man of color as the romantic lead. I would also hope that a woman as strong and self-aware as Yves appeared to be wouldn't need a white knight, white prince, white savior, etc. Finally, I also wish Harrison offered a more detailed physical description of Julian, Yves' secondary love interest. Julian was written with a distinct voice and colorful personality. He was such an interesting character, written as an emotionally intuitive and sensitive guy, with a great sense of humor, and artistic talent on top of everything else. I really wanted a HEA for Julian, and I hope to hear more about his painting series for which Yves was his muse. Sadly, though, due to an insufficient physical description of Julian, I couldn't imagine what he looked like, and after the care with which Yves and Eli were physically described, and with which Julian's personality is painted, I wanted to be able to picture him as Yves was interacting with him;
3. having a leading lady who is aware of what she wants, and is able to articulate her desires and priorities, as well as give voice to her fears, even if only to herself. I'm tired of female leads who, while described as strong, intelligent and sensitive, are also clueless about what they want for themselves, and have to be tricked, seduced, or bullied into relationships by men who just so happen to know them better than they know themselves. It's not impossible to be intelligent and an emotional mess, but I feel like that character has been overdone. While Yves definitely has a lot to still learn about life and even about herself, she recognizes that a combination of her own decisions (for which she takes responsibility) and life's circumstances have brought her to her current position in life. So often, female leads are written and described as these incredibly capable women who have everything together except their love life, wherein they're depicted as a victim of life's circumstances, low self-esteem, and bad luck, while the love life they want is just beyond their reach and Mr. Right is the bridge needed to get her from here to there, or possibly even right before their eyes, if they would only open themselves up to the Mr. Right who is directly in front of them;
4. and reading about a male lead who, while sexually dominant, wasn't written as omniscient, clairvoyant, patronizing, or even always the aggressor (sexual or otherwise) in a situation. So often, sexually dominant men are depicted as these alpha men, who aren't very nuanced. They never make mistakes, or are slow to acknowledge the mistakes they do make. They never get nervous, or show any doubt. They mask their vulnerability in overbearing, jealous, controlling, and patronizing behaviors. Sexually dominant men are also often depicted as clairvoyant guys who, without much effort, know what their lady likes, wants, and needs, even at the beginning of a relationship. Eli, on the other hand, got to know Yves over time through her anonymous blog, which was a diary of her intimate thoughts. He also got to know her through her poetry, and from reading drafts of her book. Finally, he got to know her from just hanging out with her at her favorite dive bar, and listening to her talk about her life, her fears, her family, etc. I do wish we'd gotten to hear more from Eli, and learn more about him, but I'm guessing (and hoping) those moments will come in the next two books. In any case, there are so many ways for an author to write an alpha male and yet I rarely see authors go outside of the mold (Cara McKenna's male lead in Hard Time is another good example of a nuanced alpha male). As such, I enjoyed Harrison's depiction of Eli, who was alpha enough to whup Cesar's ass and prevent Cesar from raping Yves, and yet secure enough in his relationship with Yves to not demand more of her than their relationship could bear or to try to curb/control her sexual exploits given his lack of a claim on her and the sensitive nature of their relationship. However, Eli was also vulnerable enough to plead with Yvie to be let into her heart where no one had ever been, instead of aggressively and patronizingly pushing his way into her heart because he knows what's best for her and he's there to save her from herself. I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that Harrison's developed a gamma hero in Eli's character. That may be the case, and I could be way off base, but even with Eli's high level of emotional intelligence, I still saw him as very alpha- just a more nuanced and realistic alpha than what I normally consume in my romance reading.
I'm still processing some things, like Yvie and Cesar's relationship, Yvie's relationship with her mom and her mom's response to Cesar's abuse of Yves, Yves' relationship with her dad (Where was he when Yves was in recovering from Cesar's attack?), and the resolution of Julian's and Yvie's relationship (Will there be a formal goodbye, and will we hear more of Julian's latest painting series?). These questions and concerns only motivate me to read the 2nd book. I think it's safe to say, though, that I truly enjoyed this 1st book. I can't wait to read more books by Tasha L. Harrison!